Barb Estin Bunnell

Tribute to Barb Estin Bunnell

by Ron Bunnell

Barb Estin Bunnell was an artist, an entrepreneur, a world traveler, a master bridge player, a mother and devoted grandmother. I was happily married to her for 40 years. 

Quilting

Most people treat her award winning quilts as works of art, something to be hung on walls and admired at a distance. Barb always said, “Quilts are made to be used, put them on beds, use them for picnics, cuddle up in them.” In addition to making quilts, herself, she inspired and taught others. Her store, Quilter’s Quarters, was a place of joy. When I walked in, I would see women congratulating each other on their latest creations and hear laughter rising from the downstairs classroom. Barb lived the American dream by turning her passion into a thriving business.

World Traveler

We joked that Barb never saw a trip she didn’t like.  She traveled to all seven continents taking wildlife and scenic photographs.  She went on over 15 African safaris, took photos of polar bears in northern Canada, penguins in Antartica and whales in their Baja breeding grounds.

Cheerleader

Our two boys,  Brian and Dan, were standout athletes. Barb was the chief cheerleader for them and their friends. She scored swim meets, coached baseball, raised money for the hockey club and hosted spaghetti dinners for the cross country team.  We traveled hundreds of miles each season to support their teams. 

Game player

Barb took up duplicate bridge and quickly racked up masters points. I wasn’t her best partner but I was her favorite. We did well in regional and national tournaments.  She loved playing all kind of games with the grandkids, but her favorite activity was building Lego structures with them.

Helping hand

If a friend or family member needed help, she was there. She traveled to New York City to help her friend, Cindy Burrows’71, when she gave birth to triplets. She flew her aging father to Israel for a granddaughters wedding, bought groceries for the housebound, cared for sick friends, assisted with the grandkids. Where she was needed, she was there.

Response to “I’m gay”

Late in our marriage, I came out to her as gay. Her response amazed me.  She said, “I love you. I want to stay married” She was okay with me having a boyfriend. A year before she died, she met my current spouse, Scott Coulter. She said, “You found a keeper.” 

Pay it Forward 

Although she had a heart of gold, she had defective kidneys.  I badly wanted to give her one of mine, but we were incompatible. In 2007, we became part of the first ever pay-it-forward kidney chain.  Matt Jones, a stranger at the time, donated a kidney to Barb. He wanted nothing in return except that I pay it forward.  A week after he donated to Barb, I flew to Toledo, OH to donate to a young lady who had been on dialysis for over a decade. Her mother paid it forward and the chain continued. The story caught the imagination of the public. It was covered by the 3 major TV networks, USA Today, People Magazine and several international publications. 

A good death

Almost 10 years after the transplant, her health failed. She accepted her impending death with grace. She told me, “Don’t dwell on the fact that I am dying at a young age, remember that I got 10 bonus years.” Shortly after, she fell into a coma. It was clear she had only a short time to live. The Rabbi led a group of family members into her room to pay respects. When I whispered into her ear that we were here to say goodbye, she miraculously woke up. She was able to say goodbye to each of the 20 people in the room. She had a living funeral. She lived life on her own terms. She died on her own terms.

Survived by

Barb is survived by three siblings, each has received a kidney transplant: Chuck’70, Jim’72 & Linda’77. We have two sons: Brian teaches AP Chemistry and lives in Lakewood during the school year and at his Minnesota lake home during the summer. Dan is a CFO with Northwestern Memorial Health System in Chicago. She was devoted to our five grandsons: Estin (18), Dade (16), Curran (15), Hudson (12), Gavin (12)